Wednesday, January 4, 2012

Deny Thy Self

I hope everyone had a great new year celebration and I’m sure most everybody is back in the swing of it all.

The hubs and I had a low-key New Year’s Eve, but we made it out.

Hey, it’s progress.

Our first NYE together we spend running around London Gatwick Airport looking for our hotel (Did you know there are three! Holiday Inns at the Gatwick Airport? … We’ve been to all three).

The second year, we (as in Mark) had just finished an 18-hour drive from Ohio. We couldn't move into our apartment until Jan. 1, so we stayed the night on the sailboat in Fort Lauderdale, figuring there’d be a lot going on in the yachtie-world … except, the yachties are in the Caribbean during the winter. After a few attempts at empty different bars, we went home.Last year was a similar story.

And this year … we made it out AND past midnight!

Hubs with the countdown ball in the background

We went down to the Riverwalk in FLL. They closed off the streets, had two bands and big ball drop. It was more family-friendly than Halloween is there, and although I had my cheat meal earlier in the evening, drinking is a no-no during prep, and hubs felt out of place drinking alone, so it was a rather tame evening.

Goodbye 2011!

Next year, we'll hopefully get our butts in gear and ring in 2013 in style. (It will be a big year of change for us, so it deserves to be rung in right!)

With that said, I have been thinking of resolutions. I believe resolutions never last through March; so I rather have goals.

It started four years ago, after I found myself as one of a few single gals in my group of friends. I realized I didn’t want to even consider a relationship until I got some things outta the way (for example, I’d always enjoyed acting and theater, so I thought I’d put all those classes to use and start auditioning. I got a part in a community theater production and got paid for a few industrials: the training videos you watch when you start a new job … if you worked for Macy’s or Vicki’s Secret you might have seem me :))

Last year’s a goal was to compete in a bikini competition.

I also don’t believe in resolving ambiguously. I find that if I make specific, realistic goals, I tend to achieve them. And, while I have a list of things I’d like to accomplish, I usually focus on one goal at a time. When that’s done, I choose another.

This year, my goals converge into one major theme.

I’ve been reading the book, Not a Fan by Kyle Idleman. It talks about how being a Christian isn't about being a fan, but rather realizing what it means to become a commited follower. As Idleman says, “Jesus doesn’t need fans.”

One of the major themes in the book is Luke 9:23:

“… And he said to all, “If any man would come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross daily, and follow me.”

I know I fail on this daily (thank you God for grace!).

But …

… this year I joined a new training team. It’s a yearlong commitment, which means a yearlong commitment to dieting (different for contest prep and off season, but it means I need to consciously think about what I put in my mouth). It’s a mentally daunting concept, especially since I have a HUGE sweet tooth and a never-ending pit doctors call a “stomach.”

On vacation (probably while craving a mimosa or piece of cheesecake) I read the verse and realized I needed to give this year of sacrifice of what I want (as well as fear, uncertainty, stress … insert adjective here) as a lesson in becoming closer with God.

Which is my number one goal.

Beside that, I obviously want to become a better person (i.e., work on my anger = deny my first response), a better sister, daughter and friend (communicate better since I tend to not be a phone person) and more disciplined in my school work (since I need to graduate and need to work after graduation … studying for boards is probably a good idea … again, denying my want to lay on the couch and veg).

nom! nom! nom!

I know Jesus is probably talking about a deeper type of “cross,” but when I can’t have chocolate (and coffee may be cut soon!) then I need to take it one day at a time …

Have a good week!

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